I Hate This Stuff, But I Want More

I just finished watching a scene from the movie, Star Trek: Generations. Data, the android, has just had his emotion chip installed by his friend Geordi. The chip allows Data to experience human emotions that normally he would not be able to feel due to his being an android. They have just entered Ten Forward, the bar/lounge of sorts, on board the Enterprise. Guinan, the bartender, offers Data a new beverage for him to try. After taking a large gulp of the drink Data makes a horrible face and gags. He tries it again with the same response. Data, who has never experienced this type of emotion before, has trouble describing how the drink makes him feel. Guinan tells Data, "It looks like you hate it!". Data responds in an enthusiastic voice, "Yes, I hate this stuff. This stuff is revolting!" Guinan, seeing Data's happiness at being able to experience his new feelings, offers Data, "More?" Data despite finding the drink very distasteful responds, "Yes, Please." Even though Data hates the drink, he is overjoyed at being able to experience even the most unpleasant emotions, so he wants more.

For some reason this scene reminds me of the actions of people who are addicted to, or just continue to engage in certain behaviors that may be harmful or unpleasant to them. Many people who engage in these types of behaviors have often experienced traumatic events in their lives, that cause their emotions to just shut down, or be pushed down. They lose the ability to feel anything at all. They choose not to feel or are unable to feel emotions such as empathy, joy, sadness, anger, love etc... In effect they have become androids, unable to feel emotions that most humans are able to experience every day. They become desperate to feel something. They obsess about anything that makes them feel "human" again. If getting high on drugs, causes you to feel. Then it is drugs they want. Even if the emotion they experience is unpleasant. If it is sex, then they seek sex. If it is video games, food or cutting themselves that causes them to feel, then that is what they want more of. They want to feel something to remind them they are human, even if it is revolting. Just like Data wanting more of the revolting drink.

Later in the film, Data wishes to be deactivated, because he cannot handle the overwhelming feelings caused by his new emotions. The people I described above also feel overwhelmed by the emotions they have so desperately sought to feel. They to wish to become "deactivated" to escape how they feel. They turn to solutions such as suicide, or other drugs, or activities, that can "turn off" their emotions as easily as they can "turn them on".

But unlike Data, who can have his emotion chip removed, we as human cannot. We must learn to face our emotions and seek professional help if necessary. Our emotions may not always be pleasant but they are ours, and we must deal with them, like it or not.